If you follow me on Instagram you would of seen me recently opening up a little about some of the highs and lows of motherhood. I have been thinking a lot lately about the expectations that we put on ourselves as parents but also the societal expectations that exist in the world. It is very easy as a mom to fall into the trap of feeling frustrated because you are unable to do all the things that you ‘want’ or ‘think’ you should be able to. To have FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) of what all your friends who don't have kids are getting up to. To worry that you are now ‘boring’ because all you can think/talk about is baby’s sleep schedule, breastfeeding and how many wet diapers your baby had. To worry that you can’t hold down an adult conversation, let alone send a professional work email because you have baby brain and haven't seen a stretch of 8 hours sleep in a very, very long time.
The truth is we can’t do it all and trying to is basically setting ourselves up for failure and disappointment. So what can we do? Well, we can’t do it all but we can do something. It doesn't need to be 'All or Nothing' but it can be 'All or Something'.
But how do we decide on what that something is? This comes down to our personal priorities. What are the things you need to do weekly that lift you up and allow you to be your best self (at least most of the time!) Perhaps a priority for you is to have a clean house, because mess stresses you out. Or perhaps you need to dedicate time each week to self care or to exercise. Perhaps carving out time to dedicate to your business or work is essential for you to feel accomplished and content. There are many things that could be your priority and what you prioritize may be completely different to what I prioritize. For me I try to prioritize 3 things each week. 3 things that I can dedicate quality time to.
- Exercise - I treat this as my daily moving meditation
- Working on my personal & business development
- Connections with my family and friends - Daily and I am working on trying to do a digital detox in the evenings so I am more present.
I make these 3 things a priority each week and because I do that perhaps other things slip off my to do list. Perhaps my whole house doesn't get cleaned or that not every meal is cooked from scratch, perhaps my hair doesn't get blow dried and my nails are chipped. If I can touch base with these 3 priorities each week then it really doesn't matter (to me) about the rest.
Its really important to identify what your priorities are but to also know that they can change. I heard recently this concept of priorities can change like the seasons. Rather than getting stuck in a rut you can shift your priorities around. Maybe for one season you make cooking family meals a priority or trying a new workout routine. By deciding on what you want to prioritize daily/weekly you can start to avoid that frustrating inbetween when your expectations don’t match the reality of your situation.
Don't try to do it all mommas! Instead, prioritize and do something.
In my household I have introduced something called the 'Power 15' this is when I give myself 15 mins to complete a task. Sometimes its a quick 15 minute workout and other times it might be 15 minutes to do a quick clean sweep of the house. The reality is I often only have a short window of opportunity to do something that doesn't focus on my little one. Its amazing what you can accomplish in a short period of time when you set your mind to it. Some of these tasks I complete in my 'Power 15' could be stretched out to an hour or more but with the right intention and focus I can get them done in only 15 minutes! Plus the speed in which I clean the house could be counted as bonus cardio!
This week I encourage you to take a moment to write down what your 3 priorities are for the week for you to feel balanced, healthy and happy and to give my 'Power 15' a try!
As always thank you for reading and leave your comments below!